JOIN ME IN THIS JOURNEY

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“Rock Bottom Wasn’t a Place. It Was Me.”

There was a time when alcohol wasn’t just a habit — it was my identity. I drank to forget, to cope, to escape. But eventually, I drank because I didn’t know how to live without it. What started as numbing turned into chaos — blackouts, broken relationships, and waking up in places I didn’t remember going.

Arrests came. Hospitals followed. Each time I told myself it was the last, but addiction doesn’t care about your promises. I hurt people I loved. I ruined opportunities. I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize the person staring back.

But something changed the day I realized I wasn’t just losing everything — I was disappearing. That was my real rock bottom. Not the jail cell. Not the ER. It was the moment I understood I was dying while pretending to live.

Recovery wasn’t a magical switch. It was slow, brutal, beautiful work. I had to relearn how to be human, how to feel, how to sit in silence without reaching for a bottle. I had to face everything I drank to forget.

Now, I live in truth. I live in service. And I live sober — not because it’s easy, but because it’s worth it. Every scar, every setback, every second chance led me here. This version of me is the one I fought for. The one I almost lost. The one who gets to speak, to heal, to help others do the same.

That’s why I created this podcast — to shine a light on the stories we’re often too ashamed to tell. Rock Bottom with Ryan is a space for real conversations with real people who have faced the darkest parts of addiction and made it through.

If you’re struggling, sober, or somewhere in between — you’re not alone. These stories are proof that recovery is possible, and there’s always a way back.